Still using this?

How many people are ACTUALLY still on here? I come here, and I see names that I don't get to talk to anymore. This makes me sad. What forms of social media do you use more now?

To the one who hides...

You let me down. I've noticed something. You've been complaining about your situation since April. That's an awfully long time to be complaining about someone/thing and not have taken care of it.

Not that I really care. Not that I don't wish you the best. But I haven't heard from you since our conversation, there is no hint that you got my email, the huge clue I sent you... or anything.

That makes me a sad blueberry.

Whats on my brain..

Okay.. this may TOTALLY be something to do to put off homework... but I've been thinking about a lot of things lately.

I want to publish stories... in order to do so, I need to FINISH them. Found that out this weekend at the Cascade Writers Workshop.

I need to quit being the procrastinator I am. It's becoming to hard.

Since my brain surgery, I've been expecting something bad to happen... I have a seizure and don't wake up from it, etc etc.

I need to get my degrees

Which means I should really be doing my homework now.
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    thoughtful thoughtful

New chapter?

Today I go to a writers conference. It will be the second year I've gone and in that past year, I've submitted to two anthologies.

That isn't very many, but if you think about it, it's more than I have submitted to in my entire life. I'm also working this conference.

Which reminds me... in the 10 years since my brain surgery, I have been just sitting back... so this year, I decided to do something about that.....

... I'm going to SpoCon this year, probably going to be working the Worldcon aspect of it.... should be interesting.
And I'm going to Worldcon this year... been asked to work the "Spokane in 2015" parties and table.
And I'm Programming 2nd for Rustycon this year.... D is Gaming, and Sheri is Dealers room 2nd.
And I'm Programming lead for C-cubed....

Frak I'm busy!


Well.. it went well. I forgot a line, but... I made it through.. .made people laugh, made people smile, poor Silke thought she'd have to go up after the first line, though. Cryed some before I left.

OMG Little David and Jamie are tall now.... I didn't see Timmy, and I have learned that you don't ask that family questions about missing family members.


So, today is Bob's funeral for HIS family. I've been asked to read something I wrote a couple days after he died. I'm posting it here for posterity's sake.

Who was Bobby L Korpi? Well, to me he was a father figure. To me, he was the opening
chapter in my life that I hold on to dearly. He was the full on introduction to science fiction. He introduced me to Star Trek and the Twilight Zone.. I remember how we used to watch those shows together. He was part of my intro to Science and Nature. I remember the Sunday nights. Were we, as a family, used to watch Nature shows. Including Nova, and that crazy Mutual of Omaha guy showing us that nature was indeed beautiful but dangerous. He was a source of entertainment, when he would threaten to staple either my or Dai’s feet to the ceiling with that industrial stapler he had, or when he would let us play tricks on each other while mum was away. He was a father. Caring for us when we were sick, loving us when we were sad, making notebooks for us.. with that industrial stapler he had… I remember when he did that.. he ended up stapling the books right into the family room floor. He was a clown, as he very animatedly drew a BFD circle in the air and shot his hand like an arrow through it, or when Nermal would come out and talk. He was an entrepreneur I remember when he started the Big Nifty Radio Company… and the joy he took in it. And the patience he had with me as I tried to learn it. He was a farmer, remember the kidney shaped garden? And “Sven” and inga? Most of all… to me, he was my father. And I love him for that..

I remember one Halloween when mum and bob were throwing a party, and bob came dressed as a mad scientist… and then bob would go to check on something, and this trashman scarecrow would walk around the party, holding a garbage can. Just once, then disappear. Several times during the party. It took me all night to figure out that bob was IN the garbage can.
I remember when one of the neighbor girls got stuck in a tree and was going to fall… I think bobby ran faster than her own parents to get her down.
I remember one of bob’s theories about the moon. Silly, yet he said it with such conviction, you’d think he believed it.
I remember he and I got into a fight, what it was about is long gone, but to make up, he bought me a lamp that was a stuffed animal lamb, with the lamp going through her. I still have that lamp.
When I got married, HE walked me down the isle. I remember how giddy he was. His face shone with pride, I don’t know whether it was one of his children was finally getting married, or that he got to walk her down the isle.

He will be missed, but he will be celebrated too. In every story that I relate about him, or re-tell that started from him.
People say that parents have the advantage of watching their children grow up, well… I had the advantage of watching Bobby grow up too. And he was a fine man.

I still can't even read it silently without tearing up.. .and in a couple hours I have to read it to a bunch of sobbing people!?!? Oh boy! Trout, grant me strength.

(no subject)

So, when Non died, and they were giving away her stuff, I was like "Oh, if its not too much trouble, I'd really REALLY like this".... now my mum is doing it with bob's stuff, and I am the first to post, so I posted, "yes. I'd like THIS"...

I just feel so... greedy?

for posterity

My stepda has cancer. We found out the week of the ... 10th? I don't exactly remember..

He has amebic disentary (yes, he lives in Mexico) and went in bacause he woke up jandiced one day after a few weeks. they noticed that his bile duct wouldn't open from his pancreas. So, they did a quick cut to get that bile duct open, and couldn't. there was a lump of something over it. the next day he went in for surgery. The came to the conclusion that it was cancer, and that not only did he have pancreatic cancer, but that it had matisasized (spread) to his liver and lymph nodes. They gave him 6 months. Mum found that there is a SMALL percentage of people who have still survived, and was determined to be one of those survivors.... I was going to go down in July, after my class etc. then they got the biopsy back, and it turned out it's LIVER cancer that's matistasized to the pancreas and the lymphnodes. then yesterday, I got a call from my sister... it got worse. hes now got WEEKS instead of MONTHS. he woke up one morning happy, then started puking up blood... they are saying the cancer is aggressive. I just hope he survives till I get down there. I missed my Grandan because I was sick too, I missed my Nonny (grandmother) because .. well... NO ONE expected her to go.. I've FINALLY got all the paperwork in, I've got my green card updated... I can't call the consulate till monday... I NEED to see him before... you know. It will kill me if I miss my chance to say "I love you" in person..

I might lose my job over this.. (we are only allowed 16 hours absence during class.. which lasts till 6-9) But my new goal is memorial day weekend.

Just needed to get this out there.

edit: Bobby L Korpi died in his wife's arms today at 3:10p. He went peacefully. He told her to tell him he loved us.

(no subject)

so.. I didn't make it to bed till, like 10:30a.. slept for three hours, work up for a couple hours, then went to bed for 5 hours. I'm EXHAUSTED.